On surreallity and the 4th of July

Since coming to America I've had the most surreal and odd experiences of my life. Seriously, shit's been bananas. From campaigning for political candidates in the snow to being stranded for hours in parking lots. I am currently in a very short line for the iPhone 3G at 3am (thanks work!) I wish to relate to you one of the oddest experiences since I've been here. And that's rafting down the river Charles in inflatable rafts for the 4th of July.

Imagine, if you will, a flotilla of cheap, inflatable rafts being paddled down a major river by odd oars and odder people, bound together by mini-carabiners, and mocing across the path of oncoming speed boats with the speed and sense of direction of a drunk snake. And you vaguely get an idea of how we looked.

It started innocently enough, about 10 people, 5 rafts, and (strangely enough) no booze. We met for a group lunch about 5 miles up from the mouth of the Charles, which was to be our final destination. Base camp was next to a Boston socialist group, who had a barbecue and yelled obscenities at boats passing by that sported the American flag. Which was all of them as it was the 4th. It was hilarious to see him yell "You're country fucking sucks!" at folks in yachts.

We eventually got three rafts (mostly inflated) into the water, but one of our party was AWOL and not expected back for an hour, so three stayed behind to wait for him and the five of us that were on the river decided to make a break for it. We moved with the elegance of a liquored up pangolin. Our rafts were crewed by people of rather disparate sizes and strengths, as well as having a wide variety of quality oars. After the three boats meandered for about five minutes, we decided to try and even out by clipping ourselves together. Two side by side and one dragged behind, we were an inverse triangle of awesome. Crappy little carabiners were the only thing holding us together. We snaked again across the Charles when moving, necessitating constant changing of paddles, but now we had a purpose! And with the occasional yell of "Igor, row!" or "Yoni, get off the damn phone!" we slowly made our way surrealy down the Charles.

The first act of mind melting occurred actually just before we combined our flotilla. My amour and I were waiting for the other boats to join as we waited in the still waters, when we perchanced to see a small trickled flowing from the leaves of a bush. "That's funny" we thought "it's not raining, nor is there a natural source for such a liquid. One wonders if someone is releaving themselves." We watched the bush with hawklike intensity until sure enough, someone skulked away from the foliage in a sasquatch like manner. We collapsed in gales of laughter, for we were clearly visible on the water, with fluorescent orange life jackets.

Things continued to get weirder, and strangeness abounded. In no particular order:

George Washington and Lady Liberty passed us on speedboats
Families with small children rowing passed us on canoes
Drunken folk yelled "HAPPY AMERICA!" to us
A small flock of geese on the bank of the Charles stood serenely by as a smoke bomb billowed forth white clouds in their midst. After a few minutes they finally realised something was amiss, and headed for the water while a good Samaritan in a grey tracksuit submerged the device
Little kids took photos of us
People pointed and laughed as we slowly and meanderingly maid our way down the river
And we picked up an extra passenger at bridge along the way

It took us approximately 3 hours to row 5 miles. That's not speedy. And it was tiring. We got there.

It was dark and about half an hour before the fireworks started, but we got there.

And we passed everyone that had passed us, and got as close to the fireworks barge as the water police was allow.

And as we lay there, on our backs in the middle of the Charles, about 200m from the launching boat, the sky exploded above us in magnificent glory.

We were close enough to feel the percussive blasts of the fireworks. It was one of the most awe inspiring moments of my life.

And when it was done, we pulled up on the banks of the river, deflated the rafts, and went our separate ways.

That was how I spent my 4th of July.