Continuing from my last post about how I'd make superhero movies, on to the perennially problematic Aquaman.
Aquaman is an entirely underrated hero (though I may be biased, hence the name), because people keep forgetting, he's not just a hero who speaks to fish, he's the Goddamn King of the Ocean! This man is lord and sovereign over 2/3 of the Earth's surface. You don't just have him fighting crime, he's a monarch, for fuck's sake!
So, I'm imagining this as a duology. Aquaman needs to be played someone slightly older, with the command and majesty worthy of royalty, but still the physique to kick ass. I'm thinking Gerard Butler, who played Leonidas in 300. Though probably with less screaming, and more understated bad-assery.
The first movie would focus on Aquaman as king. His kingdom is under siege from the lands above water, even if they don't know he exists. And it is Aquaman who decides to reveal himself to world above to prevent the catastrophic damage occurring. America and China dump pollutants, France tests Nuclear devices, Japan fishes intelligent mammals. Aquaman has had enough of your shit. So he attempts diplomacy, against the advice of many militant Atlantean. But this isn't wishy-washy diplomacy. This is stop fucking with the oceans, or I destroy every last boat in your Navy. Aquaman is a king, remember. He has to be tough and smart. At the same time as trying to deal with the world above, and their amazement (at first) and then apathy, he has to attempt to cope with increasing natural disasters around the ocean. This is the special effects, super strength, stopping sea-quakes big budget stuff that people love. Punching sharks. Rescuing people. That sort of stuff.
Plus, they'd know about surface life because they've been tapping into that huge fucking internet data cable that runs along the Pacific.
Finally, there's also a coup being planned by the militant factions of the Atlantean empire, who want to overthrow Aquaman, and go to war with the surface world. So a big part of the film would be very
Curse of the Golden Flower. You have this fantastical, unreal underwater political drama/intrigue.
The movie would end with Aquaman being deposed, and chained to a rock at the edge of an active thermal vent. To escape, he has to cut his own hand off, and head for sanctuary above water.
The second movie would be about him, pissed off, and coming to reclaim his throne. This man commands the entire underwater kingdom. He has a spy network across 2/3 of the earth's surface. He's super strong, super tough, and now has a grappling hook for an arm. He's made an unholy deal with the sharks for their support, and he's coming back to Atlantis to take his rightful place, even if he has to stain all the seas red.
Fuck yes, is Aquaman a badass.
